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Hey all, I’m new to the forum, and relatively new to parrotlets. I got my first birdie Sunni a little over 1 year ago!! She is about 2 years old now, and I am so lucky to have her. So far all has gone really smoothly. I brought her home during the lock down, so we’ve had plenty of time to bond, train, take baths, and share meals (I’m vegan and I try to keep my meals parrotlet friendly because if she hears the fridge open nothing can keep her from the kitchen! We joke that she should have been a pigeon, the little flying foodie 😂) . The only problem is that I’m about to go off to college (Yay?) and I can’t bring Sunni with me. She will be staying with my mom until I am able to find housing with a landlord/roommates that will allow me to keep her with me. I have no idea how long that will take, so I don’t know how long we will be apart. Is it possible that she will forget our friendship over the time that I am gone and bond completely to my mom? Or would she become depressed and feel that I have abandoned her? I am very very worried.
 

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Some of this depends on your mom and her relationship with Sunni. Sunni should be fine. She will grieve you being gone and miss you. She will also build a better relationship with your mom with your absence. Don't look at the bond as a bird thing but more like friendships between sentient beings. Sunni and your mom can have a relationship, you and Sunni will have a relationship. Sunni can have relationships with many people some will be stronger than others just like any other intelligent animal. Will she forget you? Doubtful unless you are gone a very long time. I have read many books on birds that have more modern day studies. My current one is very good called "The Bird Way: A New Look at How Birds Talk, Work, Play, Parent, and Think". Past thinking on birds were very wrong. As any long term bird owner can tell you birds are much more complex, intelligent creatures than most think. Parrots such as our can retain memories of others especially significant others many months or even years. Your bigger issue will most likely be your mom growing fond of Sunni and not wanting to let her go.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Thank you so much for your input and reassurance, I really appreciate it <3. I hope she does build a friendship with my mom. I want her to be happy in the time I am away, so I want her to have someone she considers a friend there for her.
 

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In our home we have one bird and two owners. We are to a degree always balancing the relationship with our birds. My wife went out of town and so now Rio is very bonded to me. More so that Jules ever was. Soon I will have to go into work while my wife works at home and I expect he will become more bonded to her. I think young birds are a bit more intense about relationships than older birds are. Maybe they are a little like people in this way. Personally I think giving your bird the opportunity to have multiple friendships / bonds is a good thing and reduces the hormonal tendencies. If you take Sunni to school I hope you find a place with lots of bird friendly people so she has lots of people that love her and lots of relationships. It will be good for her.
 

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By the way, as a rule, don't be afraid to ask a "no pets allowed" landlord if they would be willing to allow a tiny bird. I have several times, with the full knowledge and permission of management, had a small bird living with me in a place that doesn't allow pets. Those rules are in place mainly for dogs and cats, and many landlords are fine with small birds. Roommates, however, are a bigger issue. Of particular concern is anything in the air that could be deadly to birds like candles, air fresheners, non-stick pans, spray cleaners, essential oil defused, etc. The air is a shared space, so that is the biggest challenge.
 

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Hello, and welcome to the forum! I used to teach at a University and I am so proud that you are creating a career for yourself!
Sunni and your mother will bond and Sunni will remember you. I do have a suggestion you can try. Every few days, you can call your Mom and have her put the phone up to Sunni and let Sunni hear your voice. There's no miracle here, but both my p'letts loved to hear my voice on the phone. You can even use Skype! I am serious! When I talked on the phone, my birds looked behind the receiver to see where I was at! If your bird can see you, well that should be even better. Give it a try, anyway!

David and Vicki
 

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The phone suggestion is good. Jules and Rio regularly recognize our voices on the phone.
 

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I agree with asking bout the, "no pets allowed rule," someone mentioned! Tofu lived in a campus apartment with me when I was in my last semesters of schooling and they didn't allow pets on the listing but Tofu was able to be an exception becasue she was too small to cause any structural damage or be disruptive to my neighbors (my fiance and I always joke that the toddler who llives above us is probably more of a hazzard than our bird lol).
 

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One thing to note is you are probably doing best by Sunni to leave her in the most stable environment - and it sounds like for now that is with your mom. College is such an exciting time, but it can be all consuming and between the work, class schedules, a job, and your social life. That's all ok - learning to juggle is one of the most valuable parts of the experience. However you would probably find it really hard to keep the structure in your life a bird needs to have a happy relationship. Once you get settled into college, get a good rhythm going in your new life, I'm sure Sunni will be well cared for and ready to move back in with you.

As others have mentioned, birds and roommates can be really tricky. Anything from incense to over-zealous cleaning to "oh man I left that in the oven!" can be really risky to your little bird. Once you have learned to live with people and how respectful (or not) they are - you will be in a better place to figure out what is best for Sunni.
 
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